Get on github and start coding for some open source projects. When I see a link to a github profile, I take notice immediately. Code for local businesses. There are loads of small businesses in any given community who would be happy to pay a few hundred dollars for a basic website. No it's not the kind of money you might deserve, but it is worth it so that you can gain a portfolio, experience, and bit of capital to reinvest back into yourself. Where you are at is pretty awful, but trust me, if you really work at it, you will not be in the situataion for much longer. Once your foot is in the door, you should be good as gold.
Also, many companies list positions for experienced senior devs with 20 years of .Net, but just as many will settle for an enthusiastic newb that they can invest in and shape early on. If you bathe at least once a week, are not rude, are not creepy enough to make everyone nervous, and can fizzbuzz every language you put on your resume, then you pretty much qualify for an entry position most places. You might be suprised how little competition there is.
Lastly, don't bother with recruiters, skip monster.com (or equivalents), be open to positions not in PHP, don't be intimidated by every random technology listed on a job posting, and do look on local job boards (especially university boards hosted by your local CS department, since companies who post there are likely to understand that hiring the inexperienced is an investment).