I am a non-programmer that has used
the services of : freelancer, odesk,
There are very few really talented people on these services. Even the mediocre command salaries of $40k in the US, anyone competent earns $50k and up. The average bid on a site like Rent-A-Code [i've hired there] ends up being less then $20 an hour. You get what you pay for.
I've tried asking for what i need but,
I can't find anyone who can show me
any type of example similar to what I
request in the specs for the
My guess then is you don't know how to ask for what you need. You don't need to see a site that operates like one you want built in someone's work experience. You need to identify the smaller parts that make up what you want built, and see if someone has that type of experience.
Say you want a search engine built. Do you look for someone who's built a search engine? Its not likely you'll find one. Instead you might look for someone who:
- has worked with indexing large data sets
- understands methods to search though data sets without exact matches
- has experience with large databases
Even though a person has never built a search engine, these attributes will help them greatly (this is a very contrived example, and I'm listing limited points).
They have front ends and back ends,
but they don't fulfill true "live"
website requirements. "live" as to be
ready to support traffic, keys in
hand, can be updated constantly by me,
You're very unclear here. Building a site that will scale to high traffic is as much (more?) the job of your sys admin as your programmer. Not to mention your hardware. Allowing a site to be updated by the owner is the basis of any CMS, look for a programmer who has developed one ... you can swing a cat and hit a half dozen.
And finally, perhaps you're not budgeting well for your project. I've found on these commodity-programmer sites that people will bid whatever your declared price range is, even if its completely unreasonable to do so. In the end nobody is really happy. On the off chance you get a product that meets your immediate needs, be ready for the shock of your life when you want things added or changed.